It’s not always personal

Photo by Anika Huizinga on Unsplash

The advice…

This is all about perspective. There will be times in life when people are rude, abrupt, mean etc.  In most cases: this is not about you. So don’t take it personally. It’s not you, it’s them.

Where it’s coming from…

We’ve all been there – in situations where someone at school or at work snaps at us, criticizes us or says or does something that could seem upsetting. And we feel terrible.

But then we realise that that person acts the same way with everyone else. That person is acting that way because that is the way she or he is (no excuse to be mean to others, if you ask me, but that’s a different story) – nothing to do with you.

Adopting this perspective on the situation does two things. First it helps you understand the person and, in some cases, get along with them. Secondly, it protects you from getting hurt by their actions or words.   

But, truth is, when it comes to loved ones and people close to us it becomes very difficult to not take things personally. Even if a person is just being him or herself, it becomes harder to stay detached when feelings are involved.