Feeling all over the place? Here’s why.
Photo by Ben White on Unsplash
I often feel like my mind is everywhere and nowhere. Within the span of a few minutes my mind plays mental hopscotch jumping around from one task to another. And whenever I try to focus on something, it feels impossible.
For example, I often prep myself to use my morning walk time to organise my thoughts about a blog entry, but arrive back home instead having mapped out what I will wear for work, put in my daughter’s lunchbox, and cook in the evening.
I’ve often read about and heard people mention the mental load that, often, women get to carry: the constant micro-planning of little daily things.
So could this be it? Could the mental load be sucking away my attention span? Can I do anything to improve my attention span?
I reached out to Paulann Grech to help make sense of this. Paulann Grech is a senior lecturer within the Department of Mental Health at the University of Malta. As a writer, Grech is interested in writing about life from a mental health perspective - something she does a lot on her Facebook page.
Paulann explains that this “being all over the place” feeling is essentially mental multitasking.
Blame biology - it’s the way we’re wired
Women are more prone to multitask due to cultural expectations, conventional gender roles and upbringing. But, Paulann adds that, some researchers believe this is also about the way our brain is wired.
“Some studies have indicated that males typically have more connections within each hemisphere of the brain, whereas women typically have more connections between the left and right hemispheres. In view of this variation, women may be better able to integrate information from many sources and transition between tasks.
“Some studies suggest that the prefrontal cortex, a part of the brain that is involved in decision-making, planning and working memory, may be more active in women. Due to this, women may be better able to handle many activities and prioritise competing demands,” she says.
“Additionally, research has shown that women may be more adept at mental multitasking, or the capacity to move between activities mentally without necessarily physically performing a number of tasks simultaneously. This could be brought about by the variations in the structure and operation of the male and female brains,” Paulann says while stressing that it is crucial to remember that these distinctions are not always present and that there is considerable variation between genders.
Juggling requires multitasking
Paulann explains that several factors influence the demand for and aptitude for multitasking. Women, for instance, are often expected to balance a variety of tasks and duties, such as managing a household and pursuing a career. A 2019 study measuring work-life balance, published by the European Institute for Gender Equality, found that among Maltese couples with children, women are much more involved in daily care activities (85%) than men (58%).
A 2020 University of Malta study found that nearly a third of people in Malta still believe that a woman’s main duty is to take care of the home and family and a fifth believe it is the man’s main duty to earn money for the household. The pressure of expectation impacts both genders differently.
“The pre-planning that seeks to relieve anxiety, increases the mental load. It’s a vicious circle.”
“In cultures where the childrearing responsibilities are expected to be mostly carried out by women, it is no wonder that women need to continuously juggle all the different tasks required in taking care of children,” says Paulann.
“In addition to the physical tasks, this may also include a never-ending influx of information from society that has to be processed and acted upon. This refers to information from schools, communication with extracurricular activity organisers, keeping up with child-rated social media chat groups and maintenance of a friendship network - for the child and for the family. All these tasks require the ability to switch between tasks quickly and efficiently. Whilst this may be effective in the short-term, it is also synonymous with an increased ‘mental load’ – that long to-do list that constantly runs through one’s mind, which is often invisible and so goes unacknowledged by those around the individual. This may sap the individual’s energy, encourage relentless multitasking and eventually act as a trigger for mental exhaustion.”
A matter of survival
While this may seem like a super power - or a blessing - it can also be a curse. Paulann explains that it is known that women tend to experience anxiety to a higher extent than males. “This may then lead to a woman feeling anxious about the future and to ruminate about the many tasks that need attending to. Ultimately, this may also force the woman to plan well ahead of time as a way of coping with the anxiety, consequently resulting in an increased mental load,” she says.
So the pre-planning that seeks to relieve anxiety, increases the mental load. It’s a vicious circle.
“As the mind jumps between one activity and another, this may include engaging several cognitive processes, such as attention, memory, and decision-making, as well as distinct brain regions,” explains Paulann.
“For instance, if a woman is attending to work emails and assisting her kid with homework, her mind may be processing information related to work whilst assessing her child’s progress and offering assistance - all at the same time. She could be continually shifting her focus between these several duties, as well as making snap judgments and changing her course of action as necessary. It may be difficult and taxing for the brain to constantly multitask and this can result in poor performance and elevated stress levels. Nonetheless, some individuals are able to efficiently handle multiple tasks, especially if these are straightforward or well-known to them,” she says.
“While I am doing one task, I’m thinking about the three things to do after… Which might explain why my brain short circuits at times and I try to close the milk carton, with the tap of the olive oil while I’m cooking… and forget to drink my coffee.”
Whilst multitasking is not always the healthiest or most efficient approach to get things done, it is at times inevitable. However, Paulann notes, ideally this does not become the default way of living. Limiting excessive and constant multitasking may prove to be a surprisingly healthier and even more productive way of doing things, she says.
Everything Paulann says makes so much sense to me. I must admit that I feel good when, at the end of the day, I’ve ticked everything off that mental list. But it is also true that I am sometimes left feeling that I did not manage to do the big stuff during the day. The small things - like ‘take out the black trash bag’, ‘put 50c in the school bag’, ‘buy milk for work’, ‘turn off the mosquito machine’, ‘call the electrician’ - get ticked. But I put off ‘write a blog post’ to tomorrow.
I do all the little things to relieve the pressure caused by the list. And if I had to stop and think back, I realise that the mental list is constantly switched on - like a jukebox playing in my mind. All too often I am not in the moment. While I am doing one task, I am thinking about the three things to do after. And when those are done, another three pop up. Which might explain why my brain short circuits at times and I try to close the milk carton, with the tap of the olive oil while I’m cooking… and forget to drink my coffee.
Managing multitasking
Here are Paulann’s tips to manage multitasking:
Set priorities for tasks and try to focus on those of the highest priority first
Batch related tasks together - this may reduce the number of switching between various unrelated thoughts
Limit distractions by creating a calm setting or putting on noise-cancelling headphones to improve attention
Practice mindfulness – even a few minutes a day may lead to improved mental wellbeing
Take breaks and engage in regular physical activity to keep stress under control
Try to divide childrearing duties as equally as possible between the caregivers