I need to buy something! Why we feel the urge to shop and how to control it
Photo by George Bakos on Unsplash
The urge to shop is a feeling many of us experience regularly. Sometimes it is a gradual craving that slowly creeps up to the surface of your consciousness until it demands attention. It can also feature as a sudden unexpected force that grips you by the throat and propels you to the shops.
An adjective – shopaholic – has even been coined to describe that person who simply cannot resist the magical mermaid call of the shops. Often, this is a topic that is treated quite lightly and we often joke about the fact that we just cannot resist some retail indulgence. That is, until the next bank statement pops up and then the joke turns a bit sour. But why do we get the urge to shop? Is it something within our control?
Actually, on some occasions, the “urge” is just the notorious tip of the iceberg – the small visible bit protruding from a massive chunk of ice beneath the surface. Replace “ice” with “stress, frustration, dissatisfaction, boredom or sadness” and you may end up with the perfect storm. Or, in retail terms – a massive shopping spree.
A shopping urge may be a symptom
Here the term “retail therapy” comes to mind, referring to that type of shopping that serves as a direct response to the need to improve the mood, boost self-esteem or distract oneself from emotional distress. In this view, the act of purchasing items may give the person a sense of control and empowerment.
Self-worth may also be enhanced especially if the person believes that the items that have been bought will improve their appearance or social standing. Unfortunately, this often tends to be a temporary fix and it is quite easy for the person's emotional state to start spiralling down into the vortex if the underlying emotions are not addressed. Occasionally a person can be diagnosed with Compulsive Buying Disorder due to the ongoing experience of intense, excessive and compulsive shopping-related thoughts, behaviour and difficulties with impulse control.
When it comes to the psychological aspect, the picture is quite complex – research shows that the act of shopping activates the brain’s reward centres, specifically the mesolimbic dopamine system. This triggers the release of dopamine – a chemical that contributes to feelings of pleasure and reinforces the behaviour that resulted in this good feeling, potentially leading to a desire to shop more.
The urge to fit in
However, it is not just psychology that is the culprit of shopping urges. For instance, social factors have been shown to be powerful influencers on attitudes and behaviour as it is quite easy for us to feel a constant drive to acquire new items so as to maintain a certain image or meet perceived expectations of a particular social group. In this aspect, advertising, peer pressure and societal norms can trigger pressure and anxiety until the person literally caves in and succumbs to the desire to own a certain product.
This is when “wants” turn into “needs”. Marketing can be particularly effective in creating a sense of urgency, scarcity or exclusivity especially when considering the amount of time that many of us spend in the virtual realm, making ourselves easy targets for suppliers who are attempting to become familiar with our preferences and use that information for promotional opportunities. The field of consumer psychology is specifically focused on this idea, that is the attempt to understand consumer beliefs, thoughts and perceptions and their influence on purchasing behaviour.
So it seems like, after all, the urge to buy may be just another part of being a human in the kind of world that we have created for ourselves. Many of us are the not-so-proud owners of unwanted or unnecessary items that have been purchased on impulse and well, that is ok. But when is it no longer ok?
Two red flags can be kept in mind: First, when someone feels as if shopping-related thoughts and actions cannot be controlled wilfully and, secondly, when these actions are leading to difficulties such as financial strain, relationship challenges or intrusions in daily life. In these cases, the following tips may help:
Control the urge…
Recognise your triggers and avoid them
Try alternative mood boosters when a shopping impulse is experienced, eg. physical activity
Put off acting on the urge for as long as you can as it may eventually subside - also called delaying gratification
Distract yourself by focusing your mental energy on another task
Practice mindfulness
Discuss with a trusted buddy when a shopping urge is being experienced
Avoid setting up online purchasing shortcuts such as “one-click” options
As always, professional help may be needed
